


A Practical Marriage

by maggsdm



Category: Jane Eyre - Charlotte Brontë
Genre: Arranged Marriage, Dubious Consent, F/M, Good Aunt Reed, Loss of Virginity, Mrs. Reed raises Jane the way she is supposed to, Mrs. Reed sends all the kids to school, Strangers to Lovers, Uncle John is dying
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-30
Updated: 2016-07-27
Packaged: 2018-05-30 05:19:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 11
Words: 15,971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6410407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maggsdm/pseuds/maggsdm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Jane turns 16, Mrs Reed and John Eyre decide that it is time for Jane to be married. Having found her a husband, Mrs Reed sends Bessie to fetch Jane from school. This is how Jane and Edward might have met if Mrs. Reed had kept her promises.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. It has been decided

**Author's Note:**

> Jane Eyre is a story written by the late and great Charlotte Bronte. Im just playing make believe with her characters.

When I was 10 the governess recommeneded that I go to school to further my studies. She always told me that I was a very intelligent young lady. Aunt Reed agreed with her and made arrangements for me to set off to school in the Autumn. The morning I was sent off, Aunt Reed told me to make sure that I continued to be a good student, to write to her often and that she would see me at Christmas. We hugged and she kissed my cheeks and lifted me into the carriage to Bessie. 

Bessie made sure that I made it to school alright and helped me to settle in to my dormatory. I cried when she left the next morning; she told me that I would be fine and that it would only be a few more months before I was home again for the holidays.

For six years I went to school. While I was there I learned the usual courses of study however I excelled in languages and arts. I could communicate fluently in French and German and a water color landscape l had completed was hanging in the headmasters office. 

When I went home for the summer holidays after my sixth year, my Aunt informed me that she and my Uncle, John Eyre, had decided that I should get married. The reasoning was because my Uncle had become very ill in the last year and he wanted to make sure that I was able to continue his business. 

We were having breakfast in late July when she told me that they had arranged a marriage for me. She told me that the gentleman was known to be a good businessman and that he had never been married. I asked what the gentlemans name was. She said that his name was Mr.Edward Rochester of Thornfield Hall.


	2. Begin Preparations!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Correspondence begins between Jane and her fiancé and Mrs. Reed makes plans for him to visit. There is also shopping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am enough of an artist to draw freely upon my imagination. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world.  
> Albert Einstein

In early August I received a letter from Mr.Rochester.

Dear Miss Eyre,

I hope this letter finds you in good spirit and health. I am on the continent as of now finishing up a few ventures but I will soon be heading back to England. I plan on making a trip to Gateshead soon after so that we can properly be introduced. I wish for us to know a bit about each other before we are wed. If you have any questions for me please ask.

Your fiancé

Edward Rochester

I had many questions for him. I asked him about books he had read, places he had visited, about his opinion on certain pieces of art. He answered all of my letters with detailed answers and asked me about my education and childhood. He suggested books I might like to read and discussed his everyday life with me in these letters. I asked him a bit about his childhood but he was reluctant to share so I quit asking. He did tell me about his dog Pilot and about how he takes his dog everywhere with him. Our letters were lovely and I felt that we were becoming friends.

During the months of exchanging letters, my aunt was busy. She was talking to her dressmaker about clothes, shoes and accessories for me for my new role as a wife. She was constantly showing me how to run a household, things like how to keep a household account, how to arrange flowers in the best way and the like. I found it all quite dull. A lot of days I would sneak out of the house to draw, read or write letters to Mr. Rochester.

********************************

His next letter came in mid January. He told me that he was traveling back to England and should reach his destination at the end of February. Once he went home to take care of some duties he would be on his way to Gateshead. I ran to my aunt's study and rushed in the door to tell her the news. She was unimpressed with my behavior and told me so ("Jane, I didnt raise you to run through the house like a heathen") however she was happy about Mr. Rochester's pending return to England.

He wrote me again when he got to London. He told me that he should be at the manor before the end of March. My aunt started preparations right away for Mr. Rochester's arrival. Rooms were cleaned, menus were made and wine was ordered. When I asked why she was ordering new wine when we had a whole room of unopened bottles she looked at me disbelieving, "A man likes a good bottle of wine Jane! Its a part of being a good hostess to make sure that you have the best."

During this time she also had her dress maker, Ms.Watkins, come to fit me for new clothes. I really tried to get out of it by saying that I had plenty of clothes, then I told them that my measurements hadn't changed in over a year. It didn't make any difference, I still had to stand for over two hours while they measured, poked, and prodded at me. I had to stay while my Aunt and Ms. Watkins poured over fabrics, lace, and colors trying to decided which would be best and trying to get my opinion. I finally chose shades of blue, grey, green and light pinks to get them to leave me alone. They added purples and reds. I finally escaped when they realized that lunch had passed and everyone was starving. I went to bed after that adding how tired I was and that I shouldn't look tired if I was going to make a good impression. They agreed; I dont think they even remembered that it would be over a month before Mr. Rochester arrived.

March could not have come fast enough for me. I was exhausted by all this talk and action over his visit. We still wrote to each other during this time. I didn't tell him about how crazy my Aunt was being because I didnt want to scare him off. He told me that while he was away he had picked up a few gifts for me. That made me slightly nervous but then I reasoned with myself that surely he knew me well enough after seven months of correspondence to pick out something enjoyable. In the middle of March he let me know that he was heading off from Thornfield and that he would definitely be at Gateshead by March 30 or April 1st.

My Aunt was a bundle of nerves for the next week which in turn made me nervous. What if he didnt like me? What if I said something stupid and made a fool of myself? What if he actually hated wine because we had never actually discussed drinks! I confided in Aunt Sarah because I had become so distraught and I couldn't sleep.

"Why wouldnt he like you" she declared over tea. "You are a marvelous girl with many accomplishments! You are also quite funny" she said with a smile. "Of course he'll like you."

*****************************  


It was noon when we heard the sounds of horses coming up the drive. I also heard a dog barking.  
" Oh that's him! Thats his dog!" I exclaimed excitedly.  
I was excited but I was also very nervous. When I looked out the window I saw a big black dog jumping around a big black horse that had a tall man dismounting. I couldn't see his face due to a hat. Mr. Robert dismounted a horse behind him and gestured to let him take the other horse to the stable. I watched the man give the reins to Mr. Robert and then turn to walk up the stairs to the door. At this point my Aunt began pulling on my arm.  
"Jane lets go! We are meeting him in the tea room downstairs!"  
We rushed to the library and we got there just as the bell was rung. The butler waited for is to get in the room and shut the door before he allowed the gentleman entrance.


	3. First Impressions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Edward and Jane meet for the first time after months of correspondence. Shes understandably nervous.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 'It is not a lack of love but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.'  
> Friedrich Nietzsche

Aunt Reed and I quickly calmed ourselves so as to not appear flustered. The library had a little seating area that resided in front of the fire place. There were two armchairs that were adjacent to the end of the mantel and in front of them was a low table, across from the chairs was a sofa. My aunt hastened me to the sofa to sit and she moved back to stand in front of me. She turned back to give an encouraging smile which I returned nervously. There was a knock on the door at that moment. 

Aunt Reed cleares her throat, "Come in!"

Mr Roberts opened the door and stepped into the room.  
He announced "Mr. Edward Rochester has arrived to meet with you ma'am."  
At my aunt's nod, he moved aside to admit the visitor.  
"Thank you " said Edward as he moved to enter the room.

My aunt stepped forward to greet him with her hand outstretched and he took he hand and bowed over it as she said "It is lovely to finally meet the gentleman who takes up so much of my niece's stationary!"  
He had raised back up at this point to say " It is good to finally meet you as well madam."  
She smiled and then turned to me and bade me to rise as she introduced me, "This is my niece Jane."

I stepped closer to them as Edward took a step forward. I raised my head and found myself looking into a pair of great dark eyes, eyes that held an ocean of depth.  
Apparently I stared too long because he smiled at me and reached down to take my hand and being it up to his mouth.

"It is indeed a pleasure to finally meet you Miss Jane."

I smiled back at him and said "I am happy to meet you too sir. Please just call me Jane."

"Well then you must call me Edward then. God willing we will soon be married after all."

We stood thus for a while longer until my Aunt cleared her throat again.

"Alright lets all sit down and get to know each other." As she said this she ushered us back toward the fireplace. As she showed Edward to a chair he had to let go of my hand. She had me sit on the sofa again and called for the tea service. Once the tea was brought in and everyone was served she began a conversation.

"So, Mr.Rochester, how was your journey to Gateshead? Not too unpleasant I hope."

"Not at all madam, " he answered with a smile that I thought was rather charming, "you are located in a very beautiful part of the country."

They spoke a bit of the weather he had encountered on his way and if there needed to be arrangements to have his belongings brought from the inn he had stayed at, ect. During this time I found myself dumb. I could not think of anything to contribute. I had thought due to our correspondence that I would feel more at ease with him. I tuned back in when I heard my name from Aunt Reed  
"So Jane tells me that you were recently on the Continent."

"Ah yes. I was tying up some lose ends in France." He answered smiling.  
He didn't seem inclined to elaborate on his business in France. He sat down his cup and turned his attention on me.  
"Have you been well since our last communications Jane?"  
"Yes s- um Edward, I have been very well." I stammered.  
There was an awkward moment of silence where he regarded my flushed cheeks. I thought to myself, communicating is so much easier on paper.

"So you draw and paint?" He decided to take another route to conversation.  
"I do occasionally." I replied keeping my eyes on my cup.  
Aunt Reed exclaimed,"Oh nonsense Jane!" She turned toward Edward and elaborated, "She is constantly sketching and drawing. She is very talented!" I felt my blush spread to my ears, I dont know why though. Aunt Reed often bragged about my 'artistic abilities'. She weny on, "Jane is able to find the beauty in an array of objects. She is quite the artist." She was looking at me with a look of fondness on her features that I often strived for.  
"Would you like to see some of her pieces? I can send a servant for her portfolio."  
Edward answered in the affirmative," Yes that would be most enjoyable!" He sat back and crossed one leg over the other while still looking at me. Aunt Reed moved her hand towards the bell when I snapped to attention.  
"No I will go get it. I really would rather." I insisted. I was already up and halfway to the door.  
"Well alright dear." She said as I went out the door. 

I was very happy to go and get some distance. I felt that if I had a moment that I would be able to clear the fog that had obviously clouded my brain. I quickly made my way to my 'art room' as Aunt Reed has christened it. I took my time selecting pieces that I thought would be the most aesthetically pleasing. I slowly made my way back to the library. Once outside of the door I heard my aunt speaking, "She has always been rather shy in company. Quite ill at ease, I believe that she would rather be reading in a corner." She said laughing fondly.

"I am sure that once we get more comfortable with each other, conversation will come easier." It seemed as though Edward sounded hopeful. 

I took a deep breath and pushed open the door. As I was turning around from closing it, I saw them both stand up.  
Aunt Reed waved me over to a reading table saying, "Jane come set up over here so that we might see them in the light." 

Edward waited until I was passed him and then followed me over. I gently removed my pictures from the folder and laid them on the table. They moved to examine them. They weren't anything detailed. I picked these pictures because they were....safe? I knew that I wouldnt be asked too many questions. They were all landscapes, stills of birds and animals that frequented the gardens and fields around the manor. The one that Edwars seemed the most interested in was of a brook that flowed not far away. It depicted a sunny day that was tempered with the shade. The water ran gently in its bed. A family of water fowl was depicted drifting lazily on the water. Around the banks there sat a multitude of flora and logs spattered with moss. I believed that the scene was the picture of serenity.  
He looked up at me from these works, leaning over still with his hands on the table.  
He asked, "Did you draw all of these by yourself? With no direction from a master?"  
I answered, "Yes, I did." He raised an eyebrow at me. I went on,"However, the portraits never come out nearly as well as I wish. I have trouble with shading sometimes." I said this while examing a sketch of a sparrow on the low lying branch. Aunt Reed was standing back watching our interaction.  
He spoke again,"Where you happy while you worked on these pieces?"  
I thought about my answer for a bit, " I was relaxed. I felt serene in my labors." At my answer he straightened up and smiled at me. He offered me his hand and led me back to sit. My aunt had already reclaimed her seat. He soon drew me into a conversation about the works of Descartes which led into the works of Aristotle. While we were having lunch Aunt Sarah suggested that Edward might enjoy a stroll through the garden. Once the meal was finished I went to get my hat while he waited with my aunt.

We went out and I gave him a 'tour' of the garden and grounds. We were in the rose garden when he began to tell me about the gardens at Thornfield. He compares them to Eden but he admitted that he might be exaggerating a bit. I laughed at him for that. He then asked me if I enjoyed being outdoors. So I explained that most of my inspiration for my sketches come from nature. 

"Well then you really would enjoy the gardens at Thornfield. If not Eden like, they are certainly enchanting."

"Maybe you will take me to see them one day?" I inquired.  
"Perhaps." He answered me distractedly while examing a rosebush. "I really do not spend alot of time at the manor to be honest. We will be a traveling couple you and I! You have never been to the Continent?"  
I shook my head no and he continued,"I will take you to Italy to see the art of the Renaissance! Someone with your eye will appreciate the beauty of it all."  
He spoke more of all the places we could go and then all the places he had been. We ended up sitting under tree to block out the afternoon sun.  
I was tired from walking around the grounds. We were sitting in comfortable silence when he turned toward me and said,  
"Although I felt we knew each other fairly well through our letters, I feel that I have learned much more about you from actually seeing and hearing you," he paused as he searched my face carefully. He must have found my attention to him satisfactory because he continued, "We will get along very well I think."  
"Well we have only just met each other properly today. I hope that you are correct. "  
He laughed at my frank response,  
"Well yes but I can not think of any other 17 year old girl who could keep up with a discussion of Descartes moral philosophy and then continue then discussion about his influence from Aristotle!"

We smiled at each other and he took my hand in his. 

"Well...." I hesitated, "does that mean we are well suited?"

"Yes Jane I believe we are." He kissed my hand. "I believe that we will be very happy together."


	4. Rise and shine!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A short breakfast interlude.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We dont meet people by accident, they are put in our path for a reason.

I woke up feeling completely peaceful. My mind was finally put at ease after meeting Edward. I was concerned that the man I was acquainted with through letters would turn out to be someone strikingly different. I was so happy that Edward was just as smart and clever in person. 

Dinner last night was a lovely affair with good conversation. We joined my aunt after coming in from the garden to have dinner. She engaged him in more conversation about his life, interests and hobbies. In the interim I found myself just watching how animated he became about certain subjects, loving the way his eyes lit up and he spoke eagerly on topics he found the most interesting. He knew I was watching him because every so often he would turn and grin at me. 

We had dessert and coffee (tea for me) and then we departed to our beds. I could tell that Aunt Sarah was bursting to ask me about mine and Edwards talk this afternoon. However, I begged off claiming to be exhausted after such a busy day. She reluctantly relented and, kissing my cheek left me to bed. 

I was contemplating what today would bring when Bessie came bustling in the room,

"Rise and shine Miss Jane! Its time for breakfast."

I complied quite eagerly for I was excited to see Edward and speak to him more. I found him to be the most interesting person in my sphere of companions at the moment.

After washing my face, cleaning my teeth, and pinning up my hair, Bessie finished helping me dress and then I was out the door. I met my Aunt coming into the hallway and she linked her arm with mine as we walked towards the stairs. She was asking me how I slept and how did I like Mr. Rochester, ect. I was forming my answer that started with me saying that I liked Mr.Rochester very much, when she shushed me. Edward was in the foyer looking at several landscapes that were hung along the walls.

"Good morning Mr. Rochester!" My aunt enthusiastically greeted.

He looked towards the stairs, smiled and moved towards us,  
"Good morning Madam. Miss Jane." He offered me one arm and the other to my Aunt but she was off with, "Jane, take Mr.Rochester into the breakfast room dear. I will return shortly."

I smiled and began to move towards the said room.  
Once we were seated, him with a cup of coffee, me with breakfast tea, I launched into nervous conversation.

"So how did you sleep last night. Well I hope! I always have a difficult time sleeping away from familiar places. I can never shut my mind down and I constantly think about how different the room is and......" I would have continued rambling on in that fashion had he not taken my hand.

"I slept just fine. There is no need to be nervous. We are friends now, correct? You should never be ill at ease among friends."

I nodded in the affirmative and blushed, looking down at our joined hands.  
We sat in companionable silence after that exchange, enjoying our beverages. He still held my hand.  
When Aunt Sarah entered, we began our meal. She engaged him in more conversation with topics such as the weather and the landscapes in the foyer. He actually asked about them. She told him that they depicted the grounds before the manor was built. From there they launched into the history of the area. We discussed the different flora that inhabited the area and the like.

Once breakfast was over Edward turned to my Aunt,  
"I should like to speak with you now regarding arrangements."  
Aunt Sarah smiled, "Of course, we will go into the study. Jane, go out and gather some blooms for the vase in the foyer."  
"Yes ma'am." I said. I then asked Edward, "Will I see you later then?"  
He kissed my hand, "I believe so my little friend."  
I blushed again because apparently I could do nothing else as of late, and left to do my Aunts bidding.  
While gathering the supplies I would need, I became nervous and then hopeful about their conversation.


	5. Love is    friendship......

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We now get Edward's P.O.V.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 'Love is friendship that has caught fire. It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving. It is loyalty through good and bad times. It settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weakness.'  
> -Ann Landers

I watched Jane go with a light feeling in my heart. It had been years since I had felt a modicum of peace that this lovely girl had gifted me with. I had been skeptical and stubborn almost a year ago when she was recommended to me as a possible match. I was rather of the thought that the child would be some insipid debutant only concerned with dresses and shoes. I drug my feet and resisted as long as possible until my solicitor sent several strongly worded missives about me only getting older and not having an heir to the precious Rochester fortune. I finally relented to get him to stop......and I have never been more happy with a decision in my life. 

This 16 year old girl was more intelligent and insightful than most of the 'intellectuals' I had met. She was witty, funny and I found myself looking forward to those letters more than any other contact I had experienced. She laid out her life and personality on those sheets of paper. She let me see her artistic side with little sketches she would send. I felt inexplicably pulled to her and I had to stop myself from boarding the next boat home to England to claim this girl as my own. I thought of any concern possible to keep myself firmly on Continent. I told myself 'Its all very good and well for her to be so poignant and soulful on stationary, however she could be being coached.' I knew this to be untrue, some of her responses bled of innocence and naivety of life.  
For several more months I contented myself with letters and sketches, learning little details about her life, that her birthday was January 6th (and that she would be 17), that her favorite flower was crocus and that she adored classic philosophy and literature.  
While in France, I was retrieveing my ward to take her back to England. I wrote to Jane to inform her of my plans and to announce my arrival to her; I had sent a letter to Ms.Reed as well. I could no longer wait to meet Jane.  
After settling the child at my estate, I made haste to Gateshead. In my rush, I caught a storm and had to detour to an inn close by for the night.  
The next day, I made it to Gateshead. Upon being shown to the library, I found myself getting nervous. I prayed that Jane would be as lovely in person as she was in her letters.  
*****************************  
Miss Jane Eyre was a little thing. She looked delicate, almost fairy like. She was being shielded by Mrs. Sarah Reed. We made general introductions and sat down to tea. I don't remember what topics Mrs.Reed introduced, I know I responded at least; I was enchanted by Jane. Her eyes were the most beautiful emerald green I had ever seen. They were full of intelligence and warmth. She was so nervous and said little, but I wished to draw her out, so I introduced the topic of philosophy. Her eyes lit up and she became animated becoming so much lovelier in that moment. I thought that I might have met greater physical beauties in my life, however I found Jane to be more beautiful due to her mind, her sweet smile and dark chestnut hair only adding to her allure. The afternoon in the garden steadied any nerves I might have had about this match. I found myself wanting to marry her as soon as possible. Later that night, I thought of her innocence and wondered if she was ready to be a wife. She had been obviously sheltered.

During breakfast, Jane had fallen shy again. I had a good time bringing her out again. As we were leaving the breakfast room, I asked her Aunt to speak with me for a moment. I wanted her to start on plans for the wedding and I wished to give Jane her ring and the gifts I had bought her for her birthday. Mrs.Reed smiled knowingly and sent Jane off on some mundane task. She clearly did not wish to leave however she obeyed with a smile and extracted a promise that I would come find her.  
I watched her go, a warmth filling my heart.  
************************************  
As we entered the study, Mrs. Reed offered me a seat and a beverage. After we were setteled, she looked at me expectantly.  
"Jane is a lovely girl." I started off.  
"Yes, she is. So very sweet." Her Aunt rejoined.  
"Yes she is, however do you feel she is ready to become a wife?" I questioned.  
Mrs.Reed looked thoughtful for a moment, considering her words.  
"Jane's uncle is very ill and he has named her as sole heiress to his fortune." I nodded, having heard this information before. "He will not last much longer, he is getting worse everyday. Jane needs someone who will and can help her make correct decisions regarding that fortune as well as someone to protect her. A young wealthy girl is a most delectable target for those with ill intent. We decided to curtail any issues by finding that husband for her. "  
She paused to take a sip of tea. I leaned forward, silently urging her to continue.  
"As to whether she is personally ready for marriage, I believe that Jane will settle into whatever role you lay out. She was always the easiest child in this household to mind and she is adaptable. She has taken to you more quickly and better than anyone she has ever met. It is as if you two have a natural affinity for each other."  
I contemplated that information; I found myslef wondering if her Aunt had ever seen the fire in her while debating her point.  
"I should like to return to the Continent with my future wife as soon as possible. I had hoped that we would be married by the end of the month considering that the contract has already been negotiated. It just needs signatures."  
Mrs. Reed looked a bit taken aback by this.  
"Of course,"she said slowly,"that can be arranged."  
Then she smiled brightly, " Jane will want a small wedding anyways shy little bird that she is."  
"So I can count on you to make all ths arrangements?"  
"Oh yes of course. Jane will be out in the rose garden if you wish to rejoin her. Goodness, she will need that dress sooner than anticipated, and maybe more dresses and shoes, oh and she will need be packed....."  
She was talking to herself at this point, so I excused myself. She nodded while making her list.  
I went back to the guest chamber to fetch Jane's ring. It was a silver band with a 2 carat princess cut diamond mounted on it. The ring had been my mothers and I picked it up coming through the London. My mother had always told me to give this ring to a girl who made my heart soar. I smiled while remembering this, and I put the ring in my pocket. I also grabbed a few parcels that were for Jane. After making sure that I had everything, I headed out to find the girl who would become my wife within the month.


	6. The Proposal and Planning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Edward proposes, Aunt Sarah goes into super planner mode, and Jane contemplates.......

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "The most valuable gift you can receive is an honest friend."  
> -Stephen Richards

The Proposal and Planning

I was kneeling in the garden, trying to find the most perfect half blown roses. My aunt liked it when there was a mix of red, pink, and white. I was reaching under the rose bush for one such bloom, when I heard gravel crunch behind be. I quickly snipped the flower, sat up and turned toward the sound. Edward was walking towards me and my heart began to flutter. He was smiling as he sat down next to me; it was peculiar because there weren’t a multitude of gentleman who would sit in the grass and risk ruining their clothes. He settled and then looked over at me. I was still kneeling holding a pair of shears in one hand and the flower in the other. After a moment of silence, I awkwardly offered him the rose. He took it, smiled, and placed it in his lapel. He then took my hand,  
“I have just finished speaking to your aunt and we have agreed that our marriage agreement will take place.”  
My heart beat faster and I felt my face go warm. He pulled a ring box out of his pocket.  
“The only issue that needs to be sorted is whether or not you will consent.” He had opened the ring box while saying this and pulled out the sphere of silver, retook my hand and turned to fully face me. I had sat down the shears at this point and moved to a sitting position. He gently removed the gardening glove off of my hand and kissed it.  
“Miss. Jane Eyre, will you do the honor of being my wife?” He slipped the ring on my finger and the sun hit the metal make it gleam and the diamond the throw prisms. The colors were beautifully playing off the white of his shirt. I realized that he was staring at me and I wasn’t paying attention. I feel as though I blushed even deeper and ducked my head.  
“Jane?” he said my name questioningly.  
“Oh! I apologize for getting distracted. Yes, of course I will marry you.”  
He laughed at me for that answer. He moved closer to me and I tensed. He slowly brushed his lips against mine, my eyes shut and then he pulled back. I kept my eyes closed and I felt him move close again and press his lips more firmly to mine. He moved his hand to cup my neck and pulled me closer to him. I sighed and let myself be moved closer. I heard what must have been the stable door being blown open and started. He let me go and kissed my cheek.  
“So how many roses do you tend to gather for a centerpiece?”  
I looked at him with a bewildered expression on my face and then answered him.  
“Well it depends on where the arrangement will go…..”  
******************************************************* I looked out into the garden from the study window and watched Mr. Rochester move forward to kiss Jane. I gripped the window sill and watched for a moment longer as he pulled her close to him. She was not pulling away; she let herself be pulled towards him. The window was open so I slammed it shut to startle her. The noise worked and she quickly started and pulled away from him. I sighed in relief; I am going to have to watch them, particularly him. Jane is so little acquainted with men; I have kept all of my girls away from men to protect them. I sent them all to school so that their time would be limited with the opposite sex. I sent John away to school and then to my Uncle Gibson on holidays. He had an unhealthy obsession with Jane, and she was so quiet and little that I feared for her safety. I meant to keep my promise to my dear husband, James. He doted on the girls before he died. I think it was because when he was sick, they were so calm and would sit quietly, while John was rambunctious and a bit mean spirited. I kept him with me despite his protestations. When James died, I was distraught. I withdrew and I was not watching close enough, I snapped out of it when Jane was 5 and John was just turning 10. He had twisted Jane’s arm behind her back and nearly broke it; would have if it had not been for Bessie. I acted quickly, I sent him to my uncle, who arranged for him to go to school. He came here occasionally during holidays but spent most of his time with my uncles’ family. Uncle Gibson and his wife have all boys. I worry about him at times, I feel that he is lost and that I cannot help him while keeping the girls safe. I feel guilty at times; however the girls are so much happier without the threat of attack. Right now, Georgiana is with friends at the sea side and Eliza has stayed at school to continue studying. I feel as though Eliza will go to the Church with her devotion to her faith. Georgiana will meet a good man, have beautiful children and have a beautiful life. I  
My sight was draw out the window again as I heard Jane laugh, she always had such a lovely smile. It was times like this, where she is so happy, that I know I made the right decision.  
******************************************************** One month later  
I despise dress fittings. I really despise them. I understand the necessity for this dress; I wish it was over. Edward wants to be married in a week and Aunt Sarah has spun into a frantic whirlwind of energy. My cousins, Georgiana and Eliza will arrive in a few days. I am so happy to see them; I wish that I was going to get more time with them. I never expected for the wedding to be so soon. Edward explained that he was anxious to get back to the Continent to finish up some business and then after that, we would come back to England. I asked where we would live, he changed the subject. I gave up asking, for now.  
Aunt Sarah keeps trying to lure me in to the wedding planning. Luckily her friends, some of whom have planned weddings before have offered to help her. When they are around I am able to easily slip away from these meetings.  
The day after my official engagement, Aunt Sarah began sending out invitations for a dinner party to announce the event. I was helping her put them into envelopes while we had tea; Edward had gone to town on an errand. We were talking about food and place settings when she looked at me with a very serious look on her face.  
“I want you to be careful around Mr. Rochester.” She told me while taking a drink of her tea.  
“Why would I have to be careful?” I was shocked that she would tell me such a thing. She had agreed to let him marry me after all.  
She cleared her throat and took my hand in hers, “I just want you to be on your guard. Nothing should happen before the wedding that would be improper. Be sure to think about actions and consequences.”  
I was slightly confused, so she clarified.  
“There are things that are done that only married couples should do.” That cleared up my confusion; I was very embarrassed because we had never spoken on the subject of ‘marital duties’. I was at a loss for words. She gave my hand a final pat and smiled.  
“Just be on your guard child.”  
*************************************************** I was remembering this conversation while thinking back to mine and Edwards’s interactions of the past month. We spent quite a bit of time together; he insisted on it. He had said, “I just want to make sure that we know each other very well.”  
He went with me when I went out to draw. I would go to a meadow behind the manor that always seemed to hold a multitude of creatures to sketch. He would sit beside me and look over my shoulder every once in a while; he always brought a book with him. He walked in the garden with me, sat with me in the library while I read and we had tea together every day. He wanted me to brush up on French because we would be spending a considerable amount of time in France. During all this I tried to keep physical contact to a minimum. I held his hand and he would steal kisses; I feel as though I did well with keeping propriety.  
Most times, Bessie would come with us on walks and outings as a chaperone. She would keep her distance however so Edward was not as irate about the situation as he could have been. He would always try to buy me gifts. I argued with him for a while, stating that he had already gotten me birthday presents and that I did not need anything else.  
He smiled at me indulgently,” It is the prerogative of a bride groom to utterly spoil his bride with gifts and attention.”  
I grudgingly let him ‘court me’ as my Aunt put it; she told me not to argue about it and to just let him be.  
My cousins arrived three days before the wedding. We were ecstatic to see each other and we made to go away from the house so that we could properly speak about our time away from each other. It was not to be; my aunt and her seamstress whisked us into a room to do refittings for our dresses. I really despise dress fittings.


	7. The Wedding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The wedding day is here..... lots of nerves, lots of tears......

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My love for you is a journey, starting at forever and ending at never.  
> \- Anonymous

                         Wedding Day

I was startled awake by the curtains being roughly thrown back and the sun beaming directly in my face. I groaned and rolled over trying to block out the light. Then, I had my blankets ripped off me and I felt someone pull at my hands and arms to get me out of bed. With an exasperated huff I finally looked at my assailant; Bessie, I should have known. 

“Get up Miss, today is your wedding day! We have to begin getting you ready!” she kept pulling on me and I finally relented.

“What time is it?” I asked groggily. I had a time getting to sleep the night before and it felt like my eyes were filled with sand. 

“Half past six miss.” She was tying back the curtains and throwing open the windows. The scent of roses and morning dew floated in the air. The breeze was cool and refreshing. 

“Why do we have to start so early? The ceremony is not until noon.” I made to pull the blankets up around me again. Bessie pulled them away from me and offered me my dressing gown instead. 

“Mrs. Reed’s orders miss. She wanted to have plenty of time to prepare.” I took my gown and wrapped it around my shoulders. I rose and walked towards the fire in the grate, towards the table that had tea and scones on it. I made myself a cup of tea and was taking my first sip when I felt Bessie staring at me. She had tears standing in her eyes. I set my cup down and hurried to her. I wrapped my arms around her.

“Bessie, are you quite well? Do you need to sit down for a moment?” She pulled out her handkerchief and dabbed at her eyes.

“Oh miss! I remember when you were just a child playing in the garden with Miss. Eliza and Miss. Georgiana. Now here you are, about to be married! I feel as though you will never be seen here again!”

“Come now Bessie,” I led her to a chair. “Of course I will be back.” I tried to soothe her. I had grown quite attached to her as a child, we all spent most of our time with her when Aunt Sarah was busy or we were home from school. It pained me to see her so distraught. 

“Miss, Mr. Rochester means to take you to the Continent for an unspecified amount of time. I believe he means to live there with you for the entirety of your marriage. Did you not realize that?”

I had not thought about never seeing my family again. I had thought that we were just going for a time, not forever. I swallowed back my tears.

“I am sure that he means to come back to England at some point,” I told her this as I tried to believe that myself. 

The door swung open, admitting Aunt Sarah and my cousins.

“Good morning dear!” She swept me up into a hug, laying a kiss on the top of my head. I started crying.

“Oh my dear girl, why are you crying? Are you well? You do not feel feverish.”

She had taken my face in her hands and tilted my head up to look at me. I sobbed, “I do not want to leave home. Why can we not stay here?”

“Love, you are getting married. You have to go with your new husband.” She hugged me to her and I tightened my arms around her. “You did not think of this did you? I am sorry to not have spoken to you about this sooner. Everything was arranged so quickly, I did not think about you being distraught over the prospect of leaving.”

I ceased to sob, but I still had silent tears running down my cheeks. Aunt Sarah looked me over with an appraising eye, “Bessie, go have a servant draw a bath.” Bessie hurried from the room. 

“Jane, just think! You will be married and will go to tour the Continent! Is that not exciting to you cousin?” Eliza had chimed in; she was trying to cheer me up.

“Yes, do not cry on your wedding day. The tears will make your face blotchy.” Georgiana advised while setting up more tea. 

I laughed; Georgiana would always be concerned with how we look. She beamed at me, looking pleased that she was able to lift the tension in the room. 

“Come, let’s have tea and eat something. You have a long morning ahead of you. Dry your tears.” Aunt Reed led me over to the table.

************************************************  
"Ow! You are pulling too hard!”

"Well if your scalp was not so tender…”

“That is attached to my head!”

“You are such a child!”

I smiled as I listened to my cousins’ bicker with each other. Eliza was trying to help Georgiana with her hair, with little success. Finally one of the ladies maids approached to take over. Eliza sat down with a book, looking annoyed with her sister. Eliza’s hair was already swept up in an elegant knot and she was in her dress. Aunt Sarah had decided that we would wait to put my wedding dress on. She did not want it to wrinkle. I was sitting by the window in an armchair, watching a couple of birds fly playfully at each other. I went to lean my head back into the chair.

“Jane! Sit up this instant. You will ruin your hair!” Aunt Sarah walked by as she said this, pushing my head up as she went.

The clock struck half past 11. I was getting nervous. I felt my heart flutter.

“It’s time to get dressed Jane.” I went over to my aunt and her ladies to be attired. 

I was swathed, laced up and pulled in less than 15 minutes. My dress was beautiful, there was delicate beading around the bodice and the train was embroidered with flower designs. It was elegant and simple, despite what Aunt Sarah wanted. My veil was light and airy and attached to my hair with a diamond encrusted comb that Aunt Sarah had worn on her wedding day.

I turned from the mirror, not recognizing myself. Aunt Sarah looked me over making sure that I was ‘perfect’, as she put it. She had tears standing in her eyes, but she shook her head and laughed.  
“None of that today I think. You look beautiful.” She looked happy. She took my hand in hers and we left my child hood chambers for what was the last time.   
************************************************  
The ride to the church was uneventful; there was light conversation about the weather and gossip about girls from the area. I was quiet; I was not thinking about anything, I just stared out. I felt my throat tightening. All too soon we were descending from the carriage and I was being led into the church. Aunt Sarah’s uncle, Richard Gibson was waiting for me in the vestibule. She kissed my cheeks once more, gripping my hands tightly in hers.  
Mr. Gibson pulled me from her, “Come now Sarah, you knew this day would come. Go have a seat.”

She left me, wiping her face with her handkerchief. I sighed, feeling ill; I was so nervous, my mind was racing. I felt Mr. Gibson pull my veil down over my face, take my hand and place it in the crook of his arm and pull me into position. He was speaking to me, however I could not hear him; all I heard was a sound like rushing wind. I felt myself being led down the aisle, family and friends of Aunts watching me. I felt hot; I tried to calm my breathing. I looked up and saw Edward standing at the end of the aisle. He looked nervous as well, his hands clenched together. This calmed me; I found that Edward being nervous was a strange comfort. We held each others gaze and he smiled at me when I finally reached him. My hand was placed in his and he led me forward towards the vicar. We stood in facing towards him and he invited everyone to be seated. I was not listening to him at this point; I was stealing glances at Edward. He still looked tense and he gripped my hand firmly in his own. 

“If anyone feels as though this couple should not be wed, speak now or forever hold your peace.”

Edward laced his fingers through mine as the vicar waited a pause; then he continued with the ceremony. Edward visibly relaxed and let out a breath. 

“Today truly is a glorious day the Lord hath made…” he began and I ceased listening again. I still watched Edward, his change in demeanor was instant, and he looked at peace. 

“Would you please face each other and join hands?” We turned towards each other and he took my other hand. 

“Edward, do you take Jane to be your wife? Do you promise to love, honor, cherish, and protect her, forsaking all others and holding only to her forever?”

He was looking in my eyes; I felt he was gazing straight into my soul, “I do”.

“Jane, do you take Edward to be your husband? Do you promise to love, honor, cherish, and protect him, forsaking all others and holding only to him forever?"

felt my throat constrict again, so I took a deep breath, “I do.”

We smiled at each other; the vicar began the reading of Corinthians 13. We were handed our wedding bands and the vicar charged us to repeat our vows.

“I, Edward, take thee Jane, to be my wife. To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer and I promise my devotion to you forevermore.” He slipped the band on my finger; it felt heavy.

The vicar then turned to me to repeat my vows

“I, Jane, take thee Edward to be my husband. To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer and I promise my devotion to you forevermore.” I was surprised I was able to speak so without my voice trembling. I slid the band on his finger.

The vicar cleared his throat and began to speak. “Edward and Jane in so much as the two of you have agreed to live together in matrimony, have by these vows, the giving of these rings, and the joining of your hands, I now declare you to be husband and wife. May the Lord bless you and keep you. May the Lord make his face shine upon you, and be gracious unto you. May the Lord lift up his countenance unto you, and give you peace."  
Edward once again laced his fingers through mine. 

"I present to you Mr. and Mrs. Edward Fairfax Rochester. You may kiss your bride.”

Edward let go of my hands and lifted my veil. I felt butterflies take flight as he pulled me close and kissed me.  
I was married. I was Jane Eyre Rochester.


	8. Reception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A brief reception, tears, goodbyes, and the beginning of a trip

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a higher form of happiness in commitment. I'm counting on it.  
> ~Claire Forlani

The wedding reception passed by in a whirlwind of activity. So many words of congratulations, shaking guests’ hands, letting them kiss my cheeks and small talk. I did not feel as though there were many guests however the time passed slowly. Finally it was time for us to sit down to eat. I did not get to talk to my new husband however; our attention was dominated by the people sat closest to us. Edward and Uncle Gibson were engrossed in a conversation about some law that was being presented in parliament. My cousins gossiped, my aunt and her friends were discussing the wedding and tried to pull me into the conversation. I was distracted, still nervous, and exhausted by the morning’s events.  
When breakfast was finished, Aunt Sarah and Mrs. Avery, one of her close friends that helped her plan the wedding, led me to her chambers to change into my traveling dress. My nerves were showing, my hands were shaking and I felt myself fighting back tears. When I was changed, Mrs. Avery stepped out of the room. Aunt Sarah turned to me and hugged me.  
“All will be well Jane. Mr. Rochester is a good man and he will be a good husband to you.”  
“I am frightened,” I admitted, my breath hitching.  
“Do not be frightened dear,” she pulled back and took my face in her hands. “Be an obedient wife; do as your husband says.”  
She had tears in her eyes, “I do not know if I always have shown you, I do love you. You have been a good child. I fear I have become very much attached to you and I will miss you so.”  
I let out a sob and threw my arms around her,” I love you Aunt Sarah. I could not have asked for anyone better to be my guardian. I will miss you as well. I hope we see each other again.”  
“We will write to each other often; write to me of your experiences. God willing we will see each other sooner than you believe.” She kissed my cheek again, dabbed the tears from my face and hers, and led me out of the room to my new husband.  
***************************************************** Edward was waiting by the front door. Our luggage had already been loaded in the carriage we would take, Elise the maid that would come with me was ready and seated with the driver; his dog lay passively at his feet watching his owner run his hat round his hand. When Pilot saw me he sat up and his tail began to swish back and forth on the floor. Edward looked up, saw us coming towards him and put his hat on his head. I could hear the murmur of conversation coming out of the drawing room.  
Edward held out his hand to me, “Are you ready to leave?”  
“Jane! Jane!” Georgiana and Eliza came out of the drawing room. They both enveloped me in a hug and we stood in a group crying and saying our goodbyes.  
“It’s time to leave Jane.” Edward stood with Aunt Sarah watching us. I dried my tears and hugged each of my cousins again and moved towards Edward. He offered his hand to me again and I placed my hand in his this time. He led me out the door to the carriage. He did not speak to me. Aunt Sarah and my cousins stood followed us outside; Aunt Sarah had an arm around each of my cousins. Edward helped me into the carriage and once I was seated I looked out at them. Once Edward was seated and Pilot was curled up under his seat the carriage lurched forward and I waved good bye to my family. I watched until I could not see them anymore.  
I felt ill and nervous; Edward reached across to me and held my hand. He moved to sit next to me and he put his arm around me. He brought my hand up to his lips and the moved to place his face in my hair. He breathed in, “Relax Jane.”  
I breathed in deeply; he sat looking at the country landscape pass with his arm around me and my hand tucked into his. I laid my head against his shoulder and was asleep within minutes.  
******************************************************* I felt her head drop against my shoulder. I looked down at her to see she was asleep. She looks younger when she sleeps. After watching her sleep awhile, I look away and stare out at the greenery that is rushing by. She is terrified; maybe she was indeed too young to leave home. Her eyes were glassy and red making the green irises shine like emeralds. I felt that it was better to marry quickly instead of dragging out the process, letting her ruminate over going so far away from her family. It is clear that they are close. Even the aunt had signs of emotion on her face.  
She looked lovely in her bridal raiment. She is all sweetness and innocence, two traits that I have found difficult to find in this life. My time spent with her has been enlightening. Her conversation has been mentally stimulating as always. She rarely gave me a moment to hold her hand let alone kiss her again. I longed to kiss her again, her inexperience was refreshing. I had to hold myself back at the end of the ceremony and only gave her a chaste kiss. Fortunately I was able to successfully distract myself from my thoughts of her by engaging her old uncle. I suppose it would have been better manners to have said our farewells to our guests, however I am not a patient man; I desired to leave.  
I was lost in my thoughts, and eventually I too fell asleep. I was awoken when the carriage jerked to a stop and Jane was wrenched awake. She would have fallen forward if not for me holding on to her. She put her hand on my leg to steady herself; I quickly moved her hand into mine. I heard the driver jump down off his seat and help the maid off the seat. I looked out after attending to Jane to see that we must have arrived in South Shield and at our hotel. I ready to exit the carriage and opened the door.  
I ordered Pilot out, following after him, calling to the driver, “Make sure that he is watered and fed.” I helped Jane down from the coach and steadied her.  
“Yes sir. You want me to bring the entire luggage in, sir?” asked the driver.  
“Yes. Goodnight.” I led Jane into the hotel and got us checked in. I ordered a pot of tea to be served in the front room of our suite. We were brought up to our rooms by the porter. The maid helped Jane out of her traveling attire, she had thought ahead to pack a separate outfit for Jane. While Jane was getting changed, the tea was brought up along with a bottle of red. Our luggage had been brought in and arranged and I sat in an armchair with a glass of wine in hand. Jane came back into the sitting room shortly after; she looked exhausted. She wearily sat on the sofa and poured a cup of tea.  
She looked up to me, “Would you like a cup of tea, Mr.Ro….Edward?” She corrected herself.  
I crossed my leg over the other and held up my wine glass, “No thank you, Jane.”  
We sat in silence drinking our beverages. I moved to refill my glass and went to sit beside her.  
“Would you like some wine, Jane?” I offered her my glass.  
“No thank you.” She was wrapping a ribbon from her dress around her finger. “Thank you for ordering tea.” She turned toward me. The sun was high in the sky and shot through the window to play off the ruby tones in her hair; it was still in that elegant knot with wisps of curls falling around her face. I sat my glass on the table in front of us and moved closer to her. She held her hands in her lap and broke eye contact.  
I lifted my hand to her hair and pulled a pin from it, “Your welcome,” I murmured as I removed more pins from her hair, as it fell in a glossy wave over her shoulders, her breath hitched. I took her face in my hands, she was tense again.  
“Relax,” I whispered to her as I kissed her.


	9. There is a First Time for Everything.....

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "People grow through experience if they meet life honestly and courageously. This is how character is built."  
> ~Eleanor Roosevelt

First Time for Everything

 

I forgot to breathe. Edward was kissing me with vigor quite frightening. His tongue swept across my lower lip and when I gasped he moved it to brush against my tongue. Even the one kiss we shared in the rose garden had not been so ardent. I felt myself being pushed back into the arm of the sofa; his fingers were wrapped in my hair. I put my hands on his chest, not knowing how to react. He moved his fingers from my hair and trailed his hand down my arm, squeezed my hand before moving to my hip. I felt him pull me up to him and then him moving us down onto the seat of the sofa. He was lying on top of me; my leg was wedged between his. I moved my hands to grip his shoulders and pushed up slightly. Edward moved back slightly and looked down at me. His eyes were almost black in their intensity. His fingers brushed the hair back from my face and his lips ghosted over mine. He moved down my jaw, to my neck and collarbone, kissing and sucking at my skin. My breath hitched and I gasped at the sensation his kisses were causing. He finally pulled back and laid his forehead against mine. He was breathing rather hard, his face was flushed and his eyes were closed. He had one hand cradled under my head and the other still gripped my hip firmly. His breathing evened out and he moved off of me; I instantly felt the loss of his body heat, I had not noticed that the room was so chilly before. He ran his fingers through his hair, and then loosened his cravat and then tossed it across the back of the sofa. I had sat up against the arm, twisting my hair over one shoulder, watching him. He had turned away from me, filling a glass with an amber liquid, which he finished in one drink. He sat the glass down and turned back to me, one hand in his hair the other at his side. He took a bottle of wine that sitting on a table and got another wine glass and came to sit back beside me. He filled the glass and handed it to me. I hesitated in taking it. He picked up my hand and pressed the glass into my palm. He took a drink from his own glass and urged me with a look to drink from mine. I slowly sipped at the drink, finding it slightly bitter and tart. He was looking at me with a blank expression. “Drink the wine Jane,” His voice was lowered and sounded harsh. I sighed and started drinking. I emptied the glass and Edward took it out of my hand. My face felt warm and my vision swam. He put the glass back in my hand, refilled. I looked at him wearily and tried to speak; he cut me off. “Jane, drink the wine.” He was sitting facing me, watching me. He looked like he was waiting for something. I finished two more glasses; he took the wine glass from me and I leaned back and placed my head of the sofa arm. He cleared his throat and moved over to me. I looked up at him, he was leaned over me. “Take my hand Jane.” His tone was gentle. I put my hand in his and he pulled me up to him. He turned me, keeping hold of my hand and placed the other on my waist. He began to lead me through the room and my knees buckled; he caught me and swept me up into his arms. One of my arms was placed across his shoulders and the other hung limply. I felt him continue walking, my head was heavy and my eyes were closed. I felt myself being laid on a soft surface. I opened my eyes to look around and saw that I was on the bed. I turned over to my side and closed my eyes again; I heard Edward walking through the room, the door being closed, the bolt sliding into place, and him walking back. The bed dipped and I felt him pulling on my foot. He was removing my shoes; I heard them drop on the floor. He then turned me onto my back, my muscles felt loose; he ran his hands up my skirt. “Stop,” I was able to push out the word between my numbed lips. “Shh,” he hooked his hands under my knees and pulled me closer to him. I felt him pulling my stockings down. He was running his hands down my legs and then moved them up to grasp my hands; he pulled me up to him and he began kissing me. His kisses were hot and frantic, his fingers combing through my hair. He moved his fingers down the back of my dress, unbuttoning, my dress was loosened, the top pulled down, my arms being exposed. He laid me back down and I pushed up against his chest and he pulled his lips from mine and moved them down my throat. “Stop,” I said again, pushing at him. He grabbed my wrists and held them against the bed and continued his trek. He let go of my wrists in favor of moving his hands behind me and pulling at the laces on my corset. My arms lay at my sides, I felt tired. He maneuvered my body, pulling off my clothes until I was left in my chemise. He moved off me and I felt the bed dip again. I heard heavy fabric hit the floor which I ignored in favor of closing my eyes again. I felt myself dozing off. I pulled myself up to the pillows and lay on my side, intending to sleep. I felt Edward shaking me awake; I turned slightly to look at him as he swept in and captured my lips. I was turned over onto my back and Edward ran his lips down my throat to my collar bone. My hand brushed against him and I felt skin. I looked down curiously to see that he was naked. I gasped and snapped my eyes shut. He chuckled lightly and pushed his hands up my thighs, under the hem of my chemise. “Please…” I whispered against his shoulder. He kissed me and laid his forehead against mine, “This has to be done. I am going to try to make this as……easy as possible. Do you trust me?” His dark eyes bore into mine, seeming to beg me to trust him. I nodded my ascent and he dove back to my lips and ran his hands up my chemise. His hands skimmed my sides, my flesh tingling in response. I placed my hands on his shoulders and tried calm myself. The wine made that slightly easier. He was kissing my collar bone while his hands ghosted over my breasts. He pulled up on the garment, causing my arms to rise up as he pulled it over my head. Edward threw it to the side and stared at me. In my hazy state I was slow to realize that I was completely nude and immediately went to conceal myself with my arms. He wrapped his hands around my wrists and pushed them into the mattress. I flexed my hands and he moved to lace his fingers with mine. He continued to hold one hand and let go of the other to cup my cheek. “Trust me,” he whispered and then moved to run kisses down my neck. I tilted my head back, feeling the skin tingle. He moved his mouth down further down to my breasts. He kissed up the side and run his tongue around the peak. I gasped and jumped pushing my free hand up against him but he only let go of my other hand and placed his palm over my other breast and began kneading it. He caught my peak in between his fingers and squeezed lightly causing me to gasp and arch. He left my breasts and moved himself to sit at my feet. He gazed unabashed at me and I turned my head away, blushing. I felt him move his hands up the side of my legs and pull my knee up to kiss the side of it. He began to slowly inch his lips down my inner thigh; I was breathing harder. “There is a spot here my love,” he placed his hand over me and I gasped. “There is a little button here that will help you to relax. Will you let me find it?” I nodded weakly, I had realized that I had no other choice but to trust in him. I felt him exhale against my center and I tried to snap my knees together but he was kneeling in between. My eyes closed and my mouth fell open as I felt his tongue run from my opening up to the top of my center. He moved his tongue against me and I felt waves of pleasure rush through me. My hands gripped the sheets at my sides as I let a moan roll from my lips. I felt hollow, a hollowness that had never been before, it was almost painful. I felt something probing my opening and lifted myself up on my elbows to see what he was doing to me. His mouth was locked around the top of me and his arm was moving back and forth, his fingers digging into me. My legs began to shake and I let my head drop back onto the mattress and ran my fingers through his hair, arching against his mouth. He hooked his fingers inside of me and I let out a loud gasp and I felt a shudder run through me. He moved his mouth to the front of my hip, laying kisses there while his fingers worked inside of me, his thumb against that sensitive part of me. “Come for me Jane.” He growled huskily. I arched up into his hand, my breath hitching, “I don’t understand.” My voice was reedy and high. I felt a culmination of pleasure at the bottom of my stomach waiting to be released. He chuckled against me, “You will love. Let it come.” He curved his fingers and reattached his mouth to me again. I began to see light behind my eyelids and suddenly everything exploded. “Edward!” I felt as though I was falling apart. I arched, moaned, and I felt myself try to twist away from him. All of my nerves were on fire, spiked with pleasure. I was boneless lying there with my knee over his shoulder, my hands lying uselessly in his hair. He was kissing my thigh again, his fingers still flexing inside me, causing my breath to hitch. He moved up to face me and kissed me. His tongue tangled with mine and I pushed my fingers through his hair. He rocked his hips against me and hit that bundle of nerves again. I pushed my body up to his, the peaks of my breasts brushing against his chest. He moved his hands down my body again to rest between us. I looked down in time to see him wrap his hand around himself. I brought my eyes back his and I shuddered as his ran the tip of his member against me. “Are you ready?” He asked shakily. His eyes were dark and his features stern. I reached up to place my hand against his cheek. He turned his head to the side to kiss my wrist. He lowered himself down on me. He began to lead himself into me but there was resistance. He breathed in deeply and tried again. I moved my arms around his waist. He put his forehead against mine and closed his eyes, “I am sorry.” He breathed out against my lips. I did not understand why he was apologizing until I felt a searing pain rip through me and I tensed my body. “Relax,” he groaned out, his arms were resting by my head. I really did try to relax, “I can’t!” My voice was high and I felt myself begin to panic. “Dammit!” he moved his hands up behind me to grip my shoulders; he pushed down while he pushed himself in further. I cried out, tears streaking my face. Once he was completely inside me he stilled; He stroked my hair back from my face and wiped tears from my face as soon as they came. I felt as though I was being ripped apart. He kissed my cheeks, forehead and mouth, whispering apologies. I finally calmed and felt myself become used to his length stretching me. “I have to move,” he whispered against my temple. I inhaled deeply, “Alright.” I whispered. He pulled out slightly, causing me to hold my breath and then pushed back in to me inciting a wince. “Does it still hurt?” His voice was strained. “Mhmm, it hurts.” I opened my eyes to look at him. He looked conflicted. “Don’t stop. Will this pass?” “Yes love, it will.” He sighed and began to move inside me, slow and deep. The pain began to ebb away to a dull throb as he moved, flexing his hips; he moved one arm under me to wrap around my shoulders and began to move faster. I held my arms tightly around his waist, keeping my knees tight against him because it seemed to dull the pain. His breathing changed and he looked frantic, he began moving faster, letting out moans. Finally his body began to stiffen and he let out a moan mixed with my name. His head was lifted back and his were closed. He collapsed on top of me still moving against me. I felt his length growing softer inside me, until he stilled completely. We were both breathing hard, trying to pull enough air into our lungs. He stretched lethargically and pressed his lips to mine again, engaging me in a slow, sleepy kiss. He gently pulled himself out of me which caused me to whimper due to being sore. He kissed me again and placed his hand on my stomach. “How do you usually sleep?” He murmured sleepily. “I sleep on my side.” He pulled me towards him, with his chest to my back and pulled the blankets up over us. He laid kisses against my shoulder and back. His arm was under my neck and I moved a hand up to hold his. He placed his other arm around my waist and nestled his hand between my breasts. “Sleep my lovely little wife. We have a journey ahead of us.” He murmured against my hair. I was asleep within minutes.


	10. Touching You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane and Edward embark on their first morning as a married couple.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone who is in love is making love the whole time, even when they're not. When two bodies meet, it is just the cup overflowing. They can stay together for hours, even days. They begin the dance one day and finish it the next, or--such is the pleasure they experience--they may never finish it.  
> ~Paulo Coelho

I felt my hair being stroked away from my neck and something warm and soft being pressed into the side. I groggily opened my eyes, thankful to be facing away from the window; the sun was burning bright through the window. I moved to turn over onto my back but something was pressed into my back. I looked over my shoulder to see that the ‘something’ was Edward. He was pressing his lips to my shoulder, running one hand over my arm, the other firmly pressed against my stomach pulling me back against him. He moved to press against my neck again and caught my gaze. He redirected to my face and pressed his lips softly to mine. He spoke with his lips still pressed against mine, “Good morning love,” he moved to my cheek and down, to just under my ear, pressing kisses to my skin.  
I tried to move again, gasped and winced at the bolt of pain that shot through me. He moved a hand down to my lower back and began rubbing, thankfully relieving some of the ache from my muscles.  
“My poor little lamb,” he breathed against me. “I have had a bath drawn for you. It will help with the soreness no doubt plaguing you.” I smiled at him, grateful to him for his kindness. He crawled over me to get out if bed, a gush of cold air hitting my back. He was dressed in a white shirt and trousers; he must have been up for some time. I wrapped the sheet more firmly around me and pulled my knees up to my chest. I felt unsure of what I supposed to do now.  
******************************************************* I left the bed to build up the fire so that Jane would be warm while she bathed. I was sure that she would appreciate the bath, especially after our activities. I had not meant to act as I had, I meant to put her at ease and ask her what she knew of the marriage bed. She was so beautiful, sitting next me, the portrait of a lady.  
I shook my head of my thoughts and turned back to her. She was sitting in bed with her knees pressed against her, looking lost and so very young. She was staring off at nothing clearly in thought. She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth and pushed herself back to lean against the headboard, pulling the bed clothes closer around her. I stood and made my way over to her; she looked up at me with her beautiful innocent eyes and I felt my heart catch. I ran my hand over her hair and stooped down to pick her up, my arms sweeping under her back and knees. She wrapped her arm around my neck, pulling the sheet with her as I moved away from the bed. I carried her over to the bath, maneuvering to drop the sheet and place her gently into the warm water. She blushed scarlet, the color reaching from her cheeks down to her chest. As I settled her into the water, she pulled her knees up against her again and wrapped her arms around them. I smiled to myself and reached for a flannel. I sent the maid away, I decided I would tend to my wife myself, my pretty little wife, who was staring at me curiously, her cheeks still rosy. I kneeled down and proceeded to help her bathe.  
****************************************************( The bath had indeed helped relax me although I was flustered. Edward had insisted on helping me. He washed and rinsed my hair, taking his time running his finger though it, he ran the flannel over my arms and back his hands trailing along my skin, making me blush harder. He left to get my dressing gown, giving me the chance to finish my bath; I washed the blood off my thighs, hoping that he was right in that such a thing would not happen again. I was just finishing as he came back into the room; he laid the dressing gown on a chair and reached over to pull my hair into a low bun, securing it with pins. He held out his hand to help me out of the bath, being very much a gentleman as he pulled my dressing gown around me. I tied it and moved to walk and I felt my knees give out. He caught me and carried me back into the bedroom, sitting me down in one of the armchairs by the fire. He had tea and pastries brought in while I was bathing and they were set up on a table between the two armchairs. He waited until I was seated with a cup of tea to speak.  
“Are you feeling better now? Less sore hopefully?” He asked as he sat across from me.  
“Yes, I am much better now.” I took a sip of tea and felt a flush rising as I thought of the question I wanted to ask.  
“What happened last night, it will not always be that way correct? I understand that certain…. activities are required in marriage….”I trailed off as I lost my nerve, my eyes trained on the cup and saucer I held.  
I had not noticed Edward had moved out of his chair and knelt next to me until he removed the cup from my hands. He placed it on the table and took my hands in his. I let out a shuddering breath feeling embarrassed and childish. He moved his hand to cup my cheek and moved my face so that I had to meet his eyes.  
“I apologize for hurting you. It will not happen again, I promise you.” I placed my hand on his wrist and smiled at him. I pushed down my feelings of apprehension and moved closer to him. He wrapped his arm around my waist and I placed my hands on his shoulders. I ran my fingers through his black hair and he moved his head to place a kiss on my wrist. He pushed himself closer to me; we were face to face now our noses slightly touching. I let myself fall forward and I pressed my lips to his. After a moment he took control, wrapping his arms around me and lifting me up so that I had to wrap my legs around him. We were kissing; I was still carding my hands through his hair as he moved across the room and pressed me into the bed. He moved his hand to untie my gown pushing his hand inside, his fingers brushing along my stomach causing the muscle there to jump. I pulled him closer, thoroughly enjoying the feelings he had incited within me. I felt him take my hand and pull it between us; he placed my fingers against the buttons of his shirt. He pushed himself up slightly to make space between us. I understood that he wanted me to unbutton his shirt and I began to push the buttons through until his chest was completely bared. I pushed the fabric down his shoulders and he sat up to remove it, tossing across on the floor and his body covered mine. He buried his face against my neck and ran his tongue down to my chest.  
********************************************************* Jane tasted exquisite. Her skin was soft and smooth, she was perfection. I kissed my way up her breast and pressed my lips against her nipple. I heard her breath hitch; I smiled against her skin and ran my tongue over the peak. She gasped as she pushed her fingers through my hair, making me groan at the contact. I had one hand tangled in her hair while the other cupped her other breast, rolling her nipple with my fingers. I needed to taste her again so I moved down to her center, kneeling on the floor, pulling her closer to the edge of the bed. I pushed her legs apart and began kissing up her leg, moving toward my goal. I ran my tongue up her cleft, feeling her tense. I propped each of her thighs over my shoulders, pushing my tongue into her, my hands wrapped around the tops of her thighs. Her hands gripped mine, her nails scratching slightly, her back arched as I lapped at her.  
“Edward…. Please…” she breathed out. I circled her clit with my tongue. She let out a breathy moan. I pushed two fingers into her, her walls clamping down tightly. I groaned against her, flexing my fingers inside her inciting a hitch in her breathing. I moved my fingers inside her as I continued my attentions to her, pulling my name from her lips. I knew she was close, her walls contracting faster. I pulled back and used my thumb to circle against her clit. I wanted to watch her face as she came. I moved up beside her, my hand firmly wedge inside of her as I wrapped my arm around her neck. I pulled her up close to me to kiss her. Our tongues twisted together, her hips bucking into my hand.  
“Come for me my sweet girl.” I whispered in her ear. She shivered against me pushing up into my hand. Her eyes were closed; her head was tilted back exposing her lovely throat as her hands gripped my arm. She tensed up, her back arching fully as she fell apart in my arms. Her moans were like a symphony to my ears. Her face was flushed as were her exposed breasts, the rosy peaks hardened into pebbles. I moved my fingers inside her until she collapsed beside me again, turning her head into my shoulder. I pulled my fingers out of her, running them up her body causing her to moan and shiver again. I pressed my lips to her temple, pleased with her reactions. Her body so very sensitive to touch; she caught her breath back and laced her fingers through my hair, pulling me down to kiss her. I smirked and took over the kiss pushing her back down on her back. I was going to enjoy teaching her.


	11. Being Alone with You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane and Edward embark on their journey to the Continent and have a serious discussion.
> 
>  
> 
> A/N: I have gone back and revised some of the chapters. Nothing major has been changed, I just wanted to smooth out some of the details.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Knowing a person is like music, what attracts us to them is their melody, and as we get to know who they are, we learn their lyrics.  
> ~anon

We eventually got up and began to dress for the day. We had to be at the dock at half past two to board our ship to the Continent. I was waiting for Jane in the parlor so that we could check out of our suite. I turned as I heard the door to the bedroom open and she stepped out, dressed and ready to leave. I went to take her hand. She smiled shyly at me as I reached her, placing her delicate hand in mine. I leaned down and kissed her cheek and led her from the room.  
“Good morning sir!” the front desk clerk greeted me as I came into sight. “Was your evening satisfactory?” I moved to seat Jane on a sofa and saw that her face was scarlet; I smiled slightly and turned toward the desk to settle the bill. The clerk and I made small talk as the process was completed. I bid him a good day, collected Jane and we walked out to the coach. Once we were seated, it jerked and set off to the dock. I was planning on visiting a few of the shops around the area to pass the time before boarding. ******************************************************* Our trip to the dock was uneventful to say the least. I felt foggy and every time the coach hit a bump in the road, I felt my muscles tense. I still felt unsteady on my feet and when Edward suggested walking around some of the shops to pass the hour we had until boarding, I agreed reluctantly. In every store, he bought me something; a new set of pencils, a set of watercolors and a couple of books. It was finally time to go to board the ship when I finally got him out of the bookstore. As we made our way to board the ship, I felt anxiety creep up. I had never been on a ship before and the size of it was imposing. Edward must have felt my grip on his arm tighten, because he moved my hand from his arm to hold in his. He laced his fingers through mine and pulled my hand up to his lips. He walked me up the ramp into the check in.  
When we got to our cabin our luggage was already there. I began to look for the maid, Elise, whom my aunt sent with us, but could not find her.  
“Edward, do you know where Elise has gone?” I questioned him as he removed his jacket.  
He looked at me with a puzzled look, “Who are you speaking of?”  
“The ladies maid my aunt sent with me. Do you know where she is?”  
“Ah. I sent her home.” He had removed his cravat and settled into a chair.  
“I do not understand. Why did you send her away?”  
“She was only meant to stay with you as far as South Shield. I had thought that your aunt had made that known to you.”  
“No I did not realize,” I was looking forward to having someone from home to keep with me. I suddenly felt so very alone and felt the beginnings of heat behind my eye lids. I turned away from Edward and tried to compose myself.  
“Jane?” Edward had moved to stand behind me. He placed his hand on my arm and turned me back towards him. The felt the dam of my emotions shatter and tears ran hot down my face. Edward gathered me up to him and I cried into his shoulder. I knew that I was not really alone and that I had Edward who would be my friend however I could not stop myself from crying.  
“Oh my darling Jane,” he tried to soothe me,” this has been a trying month for you.” He lifted me up into his arms and crossed back to his chair and sat with me on his lap, surrounded by his arms, with my head on his shoulder. He simply held me while I cried; I felt grateful to him for understanding that I could no longer keep my emotions at bay. He removed the bonnet from my head and ran his hands along my arm. I calmed slowly and sank fully into his embrace allowing myself to fall asleep.  
******************************************************* As she was falling asleep I pulled out my handkerchief to dry the tears from her cheeks. I continued to hold her alternating between looking down at her and staring off into the distance. We had a beautiful view of the channel in our cabin and I watched as the ship moved further into the water. At length I rose to place her in our bed; however when I moved to set her down her arms tightened around me. I gently moved them and went to remove her shoes and dress. She woke while I was maneuvering her to undress her. Her eyes were red but it made the green in her irises more vivid. Once the task was complete I turned to leave. She sat up and grabbed hand.  
“Please don’t leave me alone.” Her eyes were wide and innocent and impossible to resist. I removed my boots and got into bed beside her, wrapping her in my arms and pulling her to my chest. Her hand wrapped around the material of my shirt and she laid her head on my shoulder again and closed her eyes. She was quite for a while, I had thought that she had fallen asleep again.  
"I am sorry for being so emotional. I knew in my head that I would be separated from my family however I am finding it more difficult to understand this fact in my heart." she sounded tired.  
I moved my hand to run my fingers into her hair and around to the back of her neck. She looked up at me, tears still standing in her eyes. She ducked her head back down and let out another sob, her shoulders shaking.  
"Jane, look at me." As I said this, I hooked two fingers under her chin and tilted her face up. She held my gaze, tears running down her cheeks. "You should never be worried about suppressing your emotions around me. I am your husband, it is my duty to comfort and protect you."She smiled at me, her tears beginning to cease.  
"The teachers at school told me that my future husband would not appreciate such evidence of a melancholy nature. They said that husbands wanted their wives to be continuously positive and happy, regardless of how we actually feel." She finished her 'lesson' with a hitch in her breath.  
I pressed my lips against hers and readjusted my arms to pull her closer to me. I tilted her face to mine again and chose my next words carefully.  
"I want us to have an open and honest marriage. We need to know what each others needs and desires are so that we can attempt to be in harmony with each other. Tell me what you want and need from me."  
A contemplative look adorned her face, she pulled her bottom lip between her teeth as she formulated her response.  
"I want us to always be kind to each other. I do not want to be left alone. Books I have read say that newly married men stay interested in their new wives for less than a year before they move on to find..... something to peak their interests. I want for us to be able to sustain the friendship that we have established so that when that day comes, we will still be able to exist with each other. " She had her eyes trained on anything except my face. I was concerned that she believed that this was the way that marriage worked. I would never be disinterested in my sweet Jane.  
"You and I have had the unique opportunity to have become friends during our courtship. I have no desire to see that lapse." She snapped her eyes to mine in surprise. "I have spent around a year getting to know you. I have invested time in you that I have never invested in anyone. You are unlike any woman I have ever met in my life. I am enthralled by you, not by just your beauty, but your mind as well. I believe that I could spend the rest of my life exploring the depths of your thoughts and ideas. Everytime that I think that I finally have you pegged, you amaze me again with your intelligence and creativity. I will never willingly part from you, my little friend."  
"You think that I am intelligent?" She had a tone of awe in her question. I nodded in the affirmative. "You are not repulsed by me?"  
"I could never be repulsed by you." I pressed my forehead to hers. "I find you most delectable." She blushed prettily at my words.  
"The teachers at school told me that men do not like when women are opinionated. They consistently pushed me to hold back and keep my thoughts to myself. That was one of the reasons I began drawing and painting. I found that art was the only medium that was available to express myself." She smiled slightly to herself. "I still kept certain pieces to myself however. Ladies are only supposed to paint landscapes and flowers to be socially respectable."  
"Maybe someday you will share those pieces with me?" I was eagar to discover all facets of my wife's personality.  
"Perhaps someday." She said this as she tucked head under my chin and slipped her arm over me.  
"You would deprive me of the opportunity to admire your skill? What shall I do for entertainment if not examine the efforts of your imagination?"  
She tilted her head back, "I guess that you will simply have to occupy your time by reading or taking on some other activity to occupy your time."  
"Well what kind of actvity do you suggest my sweet?" I moved my face closer to hers.  
She had that thoughtful look on her face that I adored.  
"I suppose you could always take walks along the deck. I believe that the ocean breeze will agree with you quite well. You could possibly join the crew and help man the ship if walking becomes too monotonous."  
I looked at her confused by her answers. She smirked at me and began to laugh.  
"You vexing little sprite! What are you on about teasing your poor husband in such a manner?"  
She continued to laugh at me and tried to disengage her self from my arms. I tightened them around her and pulled her back down beside me intent on exacting revenge. I found the she was ticklish and used that to my advantage. She giggled her breath catching as she tried to squirm away from me.  
"Edward! Stop tickling me!"  
"Say your sorry then!"  
"Im sorry! You dont have to be a sailor!" I ceased my assult instantly. We were both still laughing as I pulled her into my arms again. She sighed a little and then snuggled into my chest. She was asleep again within moments. I kissed her temple and then settled in to join her in dreamland.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to take the time to thank everyone who is taking the time to read this story. I appreciate the kindness that everyone has shown and the constructive feedback.


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